Uploads from JKönig, tagged change

i feel you, harvey. i feel you.

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 07:26:24 -0700

JKönig posted a photo:

let the madness begin

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 14:14:52 -0700

JKönig posted a photo:

so, wanna hear something cool?

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Thu, 26 Apr 2007 03:46:44 -0700

JKönig posted a photo:

i got a job. :-)

i start next wednesday, and it's in manhattan -- which means a bunch of things.

1) i get to walk through grand central station twice a day, my favorite building on the planet. if anything could replace my bridge as a daily visual embrace, it's this.

2) instead of driving every day, i'll be taking the train. so no more drivebys. well, not from a car, anyways. but the train snakes along the hudson river, so i'm sure i'll find something to point and shoot at.

3) flickr. ahh, flickr. things are gonna have to change. basically, i won't be around much. commuting by train means getting up at the ass-crack of dawn, getting home later. don't get me wrong -- i cannot accurately convey how excited i am about this job. in fact, i don't know that i've ever been as stoked about a new job, as i am about this. but it means i won't be able to visit your streams as much as i would like, and i have to wrap my mind around that. i will miss things. i will miss you. i'll still be here. just... less. i hope you understand. it's all about the balance, you know?

4) wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

self portrait

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Tue, 06 Mar 2007 03:59:59 -0800

JKönig posted a photo:

not long after posting this shot yesterday, when i really was feeling strong and confident, stupid little things -- car trouble, etc. -- set off a full-blown panic attack that lasted much of the day and night (you know it's bad when you find yourself bawling in the office bathroom). i'm only saying this cos i feel like i've set the bar at a certain level of honesty in this stream, and fuck it. other people do the 365 thing. i do this. right now, to me, this is as honest a self portrait as i could take, cos i feel trapped and moored by my own head.

see, i realized yesterday that when you're in the middle of a depression, or an emotional upheaval (as i have been since about november, related to things that have nothing to do with my job), change is a terrifying thing. and you can know in your head that it will all work out, but the pipes that connect the head to the heart, they're so clogged with fear and fog, the message doesn't always make it. and the terror i feel, i know, is completely disproportionate to the situation at hand. there are jobs out there; i am fabulous... if only it were that easy to shake off the deadweight of the fear.

and the more i look at this image -- focusing on that trite little rainbow of a lens flare, which, natch, symbolizes hope -- the more this really does feel like a selfie. cos that hope? i know it's there. i had it yesterday. and it know it's still there, somewhere, waiting for a trick of the light.

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ok, so i just titled this "self portrait." and then i looked at it again, and laughed out loud. see, i found this weight, which was hanging off the back of a truck, with duff suds, the very first time we went out shooting together. and i'm pretty sure that the letter that got cut off on the left is an H, and this says "HISSICK." but now, natch, all i see is "IS SICK."

heh.

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and just as i went to make this live, i saw this comment from florian (a.k.s. three feet of air, a.k.a. my better half). and the rainbow -- i saw it shimmer. holy fucking fuck, i saw it shimmer.

lookie what i got!

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 11:55:17 -0700

JKönig posted a photo:

i got this on my lunch break yesterday. and it feels, sounds, and smells (yes, smells) EXACTLY the way it did when i used to smack one of 'em against the side of the apartment building i grew up in.

hallelujah!

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Sun, 19 Dec 2010 09:56:58 -0800

JKönig posted a photo:

harbingeronimo!

nobody@flickr.com (JKönig) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 04:58:42 -0700

JKönig posted a photo:

i woke up this morning and felt chilly. and lo, it was glorious.